Knowing When to Exhale, When to Inhale, and When to “Hold Your Breath!”…

As a “walking ambassador” of the principles in the book The Go-Giver (by Bob Burg and John David Mann), I believe in, yet still struggle at times with “The Law of receptivity”. I have learned a lot in regard to this law in the past 6 months. Fundamentally it states that in order to be an effective “giver” you must be open to recieving.

Along what I call “the journey to my purpose”, I learned a lot along the way. When I decided to change my career to follow my passion I suddenly found myself surrounded by well-meaning friends and family telling me that I shouldn’t do this, I should do that, the economy was bad, “you have to be realistic”, etc. Even my “best friend” who had always said that I should be doing “something else” and that I should pursue my passion was suddenly telling me that “this isn’t the time…you can follow your dream later…” When I told her that I just needed her support, she replied “I can’t do that. I’m realistic”.

I believed that I was at a fork in the road. That if I didn’t draw a line in the sand right there, and continued down the path that I was on, I would be sucked in to the money, “security”, and “comfort zone” forever. I had already spent 1/2 my life there, when was going to be a good time?

I saw this “purpose” as a fragile little seed. I had to protect it at all cost. That meant not talking to family members, friends, and others that I cared about. It meant tuning out the voices that didn’t serve my purpose (theirs and my own!).  In the book, Pindar says that you cannot exhale without inhaling (giving without receiving). In this case, I had to hold my breath! While everyone was trying to “give me” their well-meaning advice, I knew that it was rooted in the self-defeating and dream-killing stories that we’ve all been taught our whole lives. Stories like “be careful, don’t take chances…” I knew that they meant well, but they were toxic.  I knew that it is the ego that worries about “what will people think…what if I fail…” and I knew that my purpose was bigger than that. I knew that I wanted my purpose to be the core of who I am, and not my ego.  I’m not very good at focusing on “me”, but for once I did. I chose self-protection and held my breath!

As I protected my little seed, by shutting out those that didn’t serve it, I discovered that space was quickly filled with amazing new people who did! People who were supportive and empowering! I had to be open to receiving the gifts that they offered.  Open to being mentored and coached and to learning and growing, open to the nourishment that they were willing to give.

As my little seed grew and developed stronger roots, I found myself “challenged” again, by the people that I had tuned out, but in a different way.  When they showed back up, now wanting to help, I had to decide whether to let them! Again I had to choose whether to let my purpose or my ego lead the way. The “air” that they offered was no longer toxic. They had water and sunshine that could help my “seed” grow…

So, again I found myself in the moment of choice. Challenged to “be open to receiving”.  I found myself knowing that my purpose is bigger than I am, that it must be nourished in order to serve others and that I must give it the energy that it needs, and that in doing so, it gives me the energy that I need…knowing that just as I had to choose when to hold my breath, when to inhale, and when to exhale, I now had to be willing to take a really deep breath.