Want to know the secret to a fulfilled and inspired life?

Clarity!

Clarity in your purpose, your passions, your goals. What drives you?

• Do you think your goal is to make money?

It isn’t! It’s what you believe money will give you! What you believe it will do for you.

• Do you believe that success will make you happy?

All by itself, it won’t. What we really want is significance. We all have a deeply ingrained need for significance. To do something bigger than ourselves.

The only thing between where you are and where you want to be is lack of clarity.

It’s not just about your thoughts. It’s about your EMOTION. Your thoughts shape your emotions.Your emotions determine your actions. Your actions determine your results.

It’s your emotion that gets you in gear!

Your emotions determine whether you find a way, move around the road blocks, over mountains and beyond, or whether you sit on the couch and watch tv.

What juices YOU?

Discover what THAT is, what it really is!

I was going to do a video on this, but this one by Tony Robbins says it all! :)

Click here to view the embedded video.

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We all hear a lot of voices on a daily bases. Many of them serve us, most us them to do not.

We hear the voices of the media, friends and family, business associates, clients, customers, and then there’s our own. All to often the voice that we hear the loudest is the one that says:

"you can’t do that! Who do you think you are? Why would anyone want you? Nobody’s going to buy that, pay for that, etc." And my all time favorite, "Be realistic!"

(Remember that nothing is ‘realistic’ before it happens! Electricity wasn’t realistic, the pc wasn’t realistic, equal rights, the ability to reach millions of people via a blog or video from your living room…)

I call that "inside’ voice my gremlin. We all have one!

The next time yours rears his ugly head, I encourage you to actively do something about it. Don’t just push it aside, or try not to hear it, take action!

Many of my coaching clients have a picture of my "O power girl" in their journals. She is there to remind them that those voices lie! And to actively stop them in their tracks. She is there at the waiting, ready to ‘kick that gremlins butt’ when he shows up! I encourage you to actively use this visual, create your own, or "bleep" that voice when it shows up! Write that nasty thought on a piece of paper and strike it out with a big red pen, or ball it up and throw it away!

It is a liar, and a thief. It is a dream killer, and a vampire that is holding you back and robbing you and the world of your full potential!

Remember, your car has all that it needs to somewhere. It has the power, the gas, etc. But it’s not going anywhere until you get in the driver’s seat, put it in gear, and step on the gas!

So, go kick some gremlin butt! Bleep as you need to, and step on the gas!

Enjoy the ride!

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Want to know the ’secret’ to success?The secret to a life of fulfillment?

Being aware of, and living and sharing your purpose.

Yep, that’s it! Sound too simple?

Perhaps, but it’s amazing how simple it isn’t, and how many people don’t.

Deep down each and everyone of us has been given an intense yearning to live a life of purpose, to make a difference. Wanting to live a life of significance is a fundamental human need.

Yet all to often we take that job because ‘it’s a good one’, and it has ‘benefits’ and ‘job security’ and all of that stuff. We start a business because we are ‘good at ______’ or because ‘it will make a lot of money’.  Even if we start out passionate about that job or business, we lose sight of that ‘purpose’. We forget why we are here, or what our intention is.

Take some time to refocus on your ‘Why”. There are a zillion ways to make money, why do you do what you do?

As women, and more specifically as moms, we often lose sight of “Us’ to. Me becomes Mom-me and whether we choose to stay home, or work, the focus is rarely on fulfilling our hearts desire. Perhaps you believe that your purpose IS raising and teaching your children. That is great if it is, but do you feel fulfilled?

Do you have an empty space in your heart, or ‘gut’ that is gnawing at you?

Ask your self, “If I could do anything in the world, and money and time were no object, what would it be?”

You might think it would be vacation, golf, or travel, but once the novelty was over, you would want to do something! Perhaps it IS golf or travel. If that passion is deep within you, start asking yourself “how can I? How can use this innate passion to serve the world in some way?”

It’s been given to you for a reason. Now, it’s up to you to discover it.

Go do it! :)

What is YOUR purpose? Passion? I’d love to hear about it!

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"Your income is determined by how many people you serve, and how well you serve them."

This is the third law of The Go-Giver: The Law of Compensation.

I actually read some variation of this law in no less than 3 different places this week! It has been written in many, many more, so let’s assume there’s some truth here!

One of the places that I read this put it this way, "If you aren’t making a millions dollars, it is simply because you aren’t serving enough people".

(Based on the law, I will add "assuming that you are serving them well!")

So there are two parts here:

1. How well are you serving? Is your mindset ‘how can I better serve others?’ Or "how can I sell more?" (remember, the word ’sell’ comes from the word ’sellan’ which means ‘to give’!)

2. How can you serve more people? Does this mean run out and advertise more? Yell louder? Nope. To serve more people, start by ‘knowing’ more people! This is about influence. About making a positive impact on the lives of others, and it starts with simply meeting new people and making new friends. Here are a few ideas to help you start TOday!

1. Visit your social networks, and look for people to introduce yourself to – online and off! Facebook? Look at your friends’ friends and become their friend!)

2. Visit your online networks, or your address book, and reach out to someone that you don’t know well. Simply say "I was thinking about you and wondered how you were doing" (if they came to mind, you WERE thinking about them!)

3. When you go into that restaurant, or drugstore, or office today, smile at the receptionist/clerk/hostess and say "Hi, I’m ___________, it’s a pleasure to meet you."

That’s it!

Make it fun!

How many people can you meet and/or reach today?

My goal is 10, what’s yours?

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In the book “The Go-Giver”, by Bob Burg and John David Mann, the first Law of Stratospheric Success is ‘Your true worth is determined by how much more you give in value than you receive in payment”. In the book, Ernesto says that asking if it ‘will make money’ isn’t a bad question, it’s just a bad first question. The first question should be “how will it serve?”

Zig Ziglar used to say “the more you do than you are paid to do, the sooner you will be paid more for what you do“.

This principle has been extolled everywhere from the Bible, to Think and Grow Rich, to Og Mandino, and beyond. I’ve lost count of how many places I’ve read it! Yet, so many people still question it. So many still live in a fear of scarcity, and a fear that ‘if I give it away, I will have nothing to sell”.

The truth is, we have more than enough! When we exceed people’s expectations, they will always pay more, Ernesto says.

So today, ask yourself not ‘how can I make more money‘, but
‘how can I give more value?”

Then have faith that all of these brilliant and successful people could not have been wrong, and do it!

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There’s a lot of talk about social media these days. Lots of people jump in, others are still ‘deciding whether they have time’.  Most see it as ‘another new thing’, and many see it as ‘one more thing they have to do or learn’.

There are lots of people out there teaching ‘how to’s’ and selling the latest greatest apps and tools to leverage social media without having to ‘do anything’ differently. People talk about ‘Personal Branding’ and all sorts of buzz words, but it’s really about YOU!

One of the first things that I do with clients is talk to them about their ‘story’. Who they are, why they do what they do, what their true purpose is, and passions are.

To learn facebook?

Yes, to learn facebook! You see it’s about more than facebook, or business fan pages, or twitter, or blogs, or logos or any of that. It’s about you…It’s about your voice, and what you are saying.

Social media is an incredibly powerful way to reach others so that we can serve them. It has truly leveled the playing field. But, it’s not just the latest greatest marketing channel, or fad. It’s not advertising, or business as usual in a new place. There is a lot more going on here. There is a lot more to it than websites and networks. The ‘place’ hasn’t just changed, the context has changed, the culture has changed, the message has changed, the audience has changed, the voice has changed…

(this is where I veer radically off course with all of those other social media folks, techy types, marketing people, and anything you might have learned in Business 101…buckle your seatbelt!)

We are living in a revolution…

First we had the industrial revolution. We had mass production, with it’s assembly lines of ‘don’t talk just do your job’, and then the Corporate world of, “Repeat after me: I will not have any ideas or voice of my own. I will wear a blue suit….”

So long to meeting the vendors on the street, and talking about their goods and services. So long to conversation.

We had mass media, and mass marketing. We had a few TV channels, and newspapers, etc. Entertainment was limited and if we wanted it, we had to endure the advertising. Since advertising was expensive, and only came in so many ‘channels’ it had to be very broad and vanilla and appeal to everybody. And if wanted to watch or listen, we had to hear it.

“So the customers who once looked you in the eye while hefting your wares in the market were transformed into consumers. In the words of industry analyst Jerry Michalski, ‘ a consumer was no more than a gullet whose only purpose in life is to gulp products and crap cash.’ The power swung so decisively to the supply side that ‘market’ became a verb: something you do to customers.”

Advertising and marketing aren’t a bad thing! We needed to know what was available. We wanted to know what our choices were.  We weren’t very well connected. If we had a ‘friend in the business’ we would choose them, but we simply didn’t know ‘one of everybody’ so for everything else, we relied on advertising and salespeople and hoped for the best.

The true definition of marketing is ‘what happens between the creation of the product and the sale.” The problem was ‘what was happening between the product and the sale’. Unfortunately, a lot of people abused us along the way. They lied, they interrupted, they spammed, cold called, screamed, etc. We got on the do not call list, celebrated the growing list of ‘spam filters’, got TIVO and so on.

At the same time we were getting sick of being lied to there, the internet was growing. Slowly and quietly at first. Limited to techy types, and then slowly reaching out into the homes of everyone everywhere. Then came easier ways to use it. Free blog sites, and social networks and so on. Now anyone could have a voice!  That grew slowly but surely and still does, every single day. Now, anyone who wants to can share their message with the world, and whoever wants to listen, can.

Adding to our frustration with the mass ‘everything’ mentality, and the corporate clones and robotic speak, along came the Enron’s and the Big Banks, and the big bailouts, etc. Now the word “Corporate’ became synonymous with crook (whether it should or not). 

We don’t like having marketing shoved down our throats, we don’t like the big voice-less Corporate Wall, and guess what? We don’t have to take it…

Blogs, Facebook, twitter, and other social mediums erupt…

We have a voice. All of us! As customers, clients, consumers, as entrepreneurs and business owners.

• We can choose what to listen to.
• We can choose from hundreds of TV channels and radio stations, etc.
• We can also choose from millions of blogs, and people having two way conversations about anything we could possibly want to talk about.

Now, because the quarantine on ‘voice’ has been lifted, we kind of like it! Now not only do we have many choices and no longer have to just pick “beaded or non-beaded jewelry’”, but we also get to hear the voice behind it. Kind of like the old days where you knew about the jewelry maker, or the shop owner. They had a personality! We like that. We are humans after-all, not robots.

As business owners, this is great news!  You don’t have to do a press release and pray that the media gods find you worthy. You don’t have to be able to afford crazy advertising prices, or buy lists of people to spam! You don’t have to ‘fake it til you make it!’

We truly can create not only a business that we love, but that customers will love, just by listening to the conversations, and choosing to let our personality show through. By putting YOU in your business, allowing those who like you, find you.

Whether online or off,  it’s kind of like a street fair…

A couple of years ago, we had a street fair here. It wasn’t organized by ‘committee’ and so without regulation, two different businesses gave two different hot dog vendors permission to park on their property during the event. They happened to be directly across the street from each other.

One was a guy from New York with a typical cart. He was cordial, but not what I’d call friendly (not here in the south anyway!). He sold a name brand hot dog with the usual condiments.

The other was a woman who although only barely 5ft tall, had a personality bigger than a sumo wrestler! She was fun loving and flamboyant. Her cart had a hot pink umbrella, hot pink drink coolers, and  homemade condiments. Her hot dogs were the same brand, and a few cents more in price.

What a great example of ‘pull vs. push’! No one chasing anyone down the street with flyers, or brochures, no screaming through bull horns. Everybody simply chose whichever one they wanted. The ‘personality’ that resonated with them! As people walked by, she cheerfully spoke, acknowledged the kids, laughed, etc. He sat on his stool and served hot dogs.

People did go to both. Some may have chosen his because they didn’t want to wait in line at hers, or maybe because they didn’t like hot pink and personality. Who knows! It didn’t take an accountant however to see what the market preferred! I don’t know how much of it was her personality, or how much was just having a personality, but not having one clearly wasn’t the winner!

So what’s the moral of the story?

• Create a business that you are passionate about (it’s more fun AND it will show!)
• Let it show! You will attract the customers that you are meant to serve.
• Let us hear your ‘voice’, and listen to ours. We like that.

What do you think? Do you agree or disagree? I would love to hear your thoughts!

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The latest news in the social networking and technology worlds is that Google and facebook continue to go ‘head to head’ competing for YOUR time, your eyeballs, and your data.

Word has spread like wildfire about facebook’s "Project Titan", which would bring email to facebook, and Google Buzz which would bring social updates to your Gmail. There’s a lot that I could talk about here, but since this is ‘good soup’, let’s talk about soup.

There are a lot of things that I like in soup. There are things that I like, that others don’t. There are things that I like, and other things that I like, but I don’t want them all together in a soup. Will this be different?

As far as email in facebook…There have been times when I have thought

"I wish I could just get my email here, while I am here."

I have often wished that I could have my Google Calendar there as well (since that is where most of my appointments are made, events found, and invitations received). But, I’m not so sure how I feel about this email thing.

Here are my thoughts:

• I don’t really love my email.
• I love GMail, for it’s ability to filter out spam better than ANY service I have ever seen.
• I need email because I can’t currently get attachments in Fbook mail, etc. I get email because not everyone uses facebook mail I do know people that absolutely don’t want business emails in fbook mail.
• Most of all, I am thinking that I like facebook mail because most of what I get there , I want to receive. With the exception of a few groups that I accepted invites from who abuse the group email feature, I get stuff there from people that I like. I can’t say that about my email.
• Although Gmail does have an amazing spam filter, I still get what I call "spam that I signed up for". I get emails that I really don’t want from people because I signed up for something that they offered. ‘
• As a result, my email is the last place I go when I hop on my laptop. I check twitter, and facebook , then email. I can easily absorb huge mouthfuls of information and updates via twitter and facebook. Email, not so much. It’s cumbersome. Scan through for what is worth reading, open, read, digest, think about the reply, reply, etc. For many however, this would be a convenience, and if I could figure out how to keep the sales pitches and other stuff out, I would probably like it. How all that will work remains to be seen. Facebook is an information aggregator afterall!

Sometimes when you add something bitter to the soup, it makes the soup better. Sometimes it spoils the whole soup! Depending on how it’s done, this is a possibility for facebook.

Now, the buzz on Google buzz.

Adding social data to gmail may just sweeten the soup.

It will certainly liven up email, and make it more interesting and less one-dimensional.

MSN and Yahoo are both quickly rushing to point out that they have had these features for some time (reminds of little playground kids "I had it first!"). But, they didn’t have Gmail.

When my outlook crashed in 2008 and I looked for a way to get email (even though I had a hosted email account) and considered the options. For whatever reason, as I thought about them all, I didn’t have a perception that gmail was for novices, so I opted for Gmail. I discovered that they have an amazing spam filter, and became "hooked’ as a result. (Having seen the email boxes of many people who use yahoo and msn, I can honestly say that GMail has a huge advantage in it’s spam filter). So, whatever the reason is that people choose GMail over the others, the fact is that they didn’t leave GMail to get social updates when MSN and yahoo added them.

Maybe that is because the CORE product is of higher value to most. Whether people will now leave MSN or Yahoo, for GMail just to get updates in their email, remains to be seen, but I doubt it. We like what we are used to.

Think about how much people freak out over facebook simply changing the name of a newsfeed (without even moving a button!).

Now, the mobile part might change that. I recently set up a Microsoft Live account because of my phone. I forward my email to Gmail for spam filtering, but then forwarded it from there to Live because I have a windows mobile phone. Since outlook still doesn’t like me, and that is the windows mobile app for contacts and calendar, I did set up live in the hopes that I would be able to get better mobile access. (It didn’t work and I am looking a Google phones now, by the way).

The point is that I was willing to convert (at least in part) in order to have mobile access, and that is where Google Buzz may very well move some folks. We all seem to want as much info as we can get on our phones these days, and the easier you make it, the better.

Do I think people will leave facebook or twitter? Not a chance.

Might they update both from GMail if that is available? Sure.

Do they want yet another place to update? Hmm..not so much.

I can get and reply to facebook updates via tweetdeck (and sometimes do), but I still go there because it is a richer experience. I don’t go to twitter.com since the experience is richer on tweetdeck. If integration exists, and the experience is richer, then people will surely use the feature. I have friends that read and respond to much of their twitter stream from friendfeed, and spend lots of time there, because of the overall value to them.

Have people been willing to add yelp and foursquare to the places that they update? Yes. Each place has it’s own value and experience.

So far, Google hasn’t had a good track record at creating that in the social space. They do have a tremendous track record for ‘relevant search results’ however, and if their promise to ‘filter out the noise’ can be accomplished, then they will be leveraging what they are good at.

For facebook, adding email really isn’t ‘venturing too far out on a limb in terms of their core talent. The question is do we want it, and will it spoil the experience?

The bottom line is,

some things are good the way that they are. 

Adding other good things don’t always make them better.

Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.

I like soup, and I like cheesecake, but I don’t want cheesecake in my soup!

How do you feel about social stuff in your email, and email in your social space?

New York Post Article

Mashable Article

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photo from http://mathewsanders.posterous.com/

Yes, more facebook changes are on the way!

Don’t panic!

It’s all good!

Most of us don’t like change. It annoys us, frustrates us and disrupts our comfort zone.  We love becoming more comfortable, but the change part? Not so much!

Facebook is actually making some good changes this time.

Things will be easier to find and get to. For some people it will appear that there are new features, simply because they never noticed them or knew that they existed before!

It is not uncommon for example, for me to encounter people who are unaware that private emails exist in facebook, that there are notifications that show you the interactions with your posts and comments, etc.  The emails and notifications will be visible via drop down at the top of the screen now.

Friends online and chat move to the left sidebar so they are more visible, as do some other updates.

There will no longer be a live feed and news feed. Top News and Recent News will be what the former streams of updates are now called.

We will have to wait and see how users feel about the changes when they are officially rolled out. My guess is there will be people who will complain.

It appears however, that the changes will make engaging with friends easier as these tools become more prominent. That is a good thing!

Be sure to sign up for RSS or email updates for future posts!

More photos

Mashable Article on Facebook Redesign

Want to learn how to effectively use facebook to grow your business without annoying your friends?

Live Lunch and Learn in Cary NC 2/19/10

Online Webinars (limited to 5 people for optimum Q&A)

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I have written a couple of posts here about Dafna Michaelson and her 50in52 Journey. The 50 state journey has ended and Dafna is now moving from  sharing the stories of  hometown heroes making a difference, to actually helping them to make it happen!

Be inspired! Watch this great video about her 50 state  Journey:
http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=6049949n&tag=related;photovideo

What Dafna is doing now:

Click here to view the embedded video.

You can make a difference too! Without traveling cross country! With just a few clicks by voting for Dafna to win a $250,000 Pepsi Grant to continue her journey to help others. like you make a difference in their communities!

Please Click Here to VOTE!

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Clarity is a powerful thing! In my 2010 Vision Coaching Mastermind groups we are talking about defining your purpose through getting clarity on your passions, your talents and your goals.

Most of the time, I find many people think they already know the answer. The trouble is that they are just a little fuzzy. Getting clarity on what you want is powerful! It changes what you focus on and it changes what you ‘ask for’, and therefore receive.

“Life will give you whatever you ask of it”. Do you know what you are asking for?

Click here to view the embedded video.

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